30 thoughts at 30

I will be 30 in a few days and want to write about some lessons I have acquired through the University of Life. They are in no particular order. Here we go:

1. Purpose trumps passion. Most of us have passions in life, such as playing football and supporting Manchester United, collecting vintage sports cars, or creating art. However, I believe purpose comes before that. As you might know already, my purpose in life is worshipping God Almighty alone. Only then will my remote career and passion for working with React and WordPress come into play.
2. One bad apple does not mean the whole box of apples is bad. There is a famous saying in our family that when you want to check if a pot of rice is well-cooked, you can test it with one grain of rice. In other words, you can judge if something is well done by checking a small sample of it. However, this saying does not really apply to humans. In a class of students, one person’s academic or personal performance can never determine the potential of the whole batch.
3. Do not judge a book by its cover. There is a famous true story of a man who hated a certain author and would not read any of his work just because he had a preconceived notion that this author/scholar was bad. A smart friend of his took a book by this same author, removed the covers and gifted the book to him. The man read it and fell in love with the book and accepted this author/scholar to be upon the truth and goodness.
4. Looking after one’s parents is a blessing. I saw someone who had posted that we must save for retirement instead of spending money educating our children. And that depending on our children as a retirement plan is not a good idea. I thought this was such a bad take that I did not even want to leave a comment on their post. For multiple reasons. Educating someone is one of the best things we can do. On top of that, educating our children, I believe, is a fundamental right we have to give them. What if we go broke while educating them? If they are raised well, they will look after us and this is one of the best retirement plans we have.
5. The ends do not justify the means. We may have the noblest of goals. However, if we are taking the wrong approach in implementing our goals, what good is there in having noble goals in the first place? Likewise, we must not steal from the rich to feed the poor. Because we are not capable nor responsible for satisfying everyone’s hunger. Likewise, vigilanteism is not a virtuous job either.
6. Ego is never praiseworthy. Some folks and careers are driven by ego, but what are its fruits? What good do they do? Confidence is good and we must nurture it. However, ego is essentially false confidence and we must shun it.
7. Gentleness gets you what harshness does not. A lot can be achieved by being easy-going and easy to deal with. Whereas threatening people and pushing your weight around and showing everyone “who the boss is” will rarely get you very far.
8. Have a good heart and do it for the right reasons. Some folks, when they make it big and have gained some popularity or even notoriety, answer when asked what made them so successful, “because I wanted to prove my haters wrong.” We like a good story, for example, someone making it from rags to riches. However, what is wrong in answering it with a simple, “because I wanted to put food on the table” or likewise.
9. You are going to die. No one is going to make it out alive. In fact, in this world, there is no such thing as infinite or forever. “We are all living on rent”, my mentor used to say. He is no more with us. God’s mercy be on his soul.
10. What goes up eventually comes down. We saw it with Nokia and Blackberry, we saw it with many successful people, and we even saw it happen with popular fashion and trends. Perhaps “what goes around, comes around,” too?
11. Are you willing to do your career as a hobby? Not everyone will say “yes”. If you can say “yes,” consider yourself extremely blessed. Like Steve Jobs once said, “Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.”
12. “Focus is saying no to a 1000 things”, another great one from Steve Jobs.
13. “Design is how it works,” yet another Steve Jobs quote, essentially means that how a product works beats out how it looks or feels.
14. “Everything has an opportunity cost,” my mentor taught me. In other words, there are tradeoffs in every decision you make. Weigh the pros and cons and most of all, do what your heart says.
15. Being happy for others is being happy for oneself. Let me explain. Let’s say someone is blessed much higher than yourself. You are only burning in hatred, anger, and bitterness if you feel like you deserve more than this person. Flip envy on its head, and be happy for them because they fully deserve what they have. Go as far as congratulating them. This will make you happier and give you a natural source of encouragement and inspiration.
16. Doing someone a favor while expecting something in return is not a favor. It is a transaction. Instead, expect the reward from God, and you will have peace of mind and contentment. Even if you do not see an immediate reward for your good nature, have that certainty that “you reap what you sow” and that you can get the fruits one day; if not on day one.
17. “What really matters are good endings, not flawed beginnings.”, Ibn Taymiyyah.
18. Run a tight ship. I first heard this from a rather successful business owner. The previous points I have spoken about mention the virtue of being kind and forgiving. However, when we do business, we need to ensure we do the right thing. The right thing often means we do not let anyone take us for a ride.
19. The more you know, the less likely you are to make absolute statements. Yet, here I am making absolute statements, still! In other words, I do not know much.
20. People are complex and unpredictable. But life would be no fun if people behaved like manufactured machines. “I can calculate the motion of heavenly bodies, but not the madness of people.”, Isaac Newton once said. It also makes life a tiny bit harder, knowing we need to deal with people justly and kindly simultaneously. Someone else’s bad behavior does not give us any license to treat anyone poorly.
21. You can never get enough of what you really don’t want. But a little of what you really need would suffice you.
22. Love people and use things, because the opposite never works. Computers are objects that help us do things. People are not. If you have employees who help you on your mission and are compensated for it, they are another resource. Still, it means we treat each employee with the decency they deserve. Human Resource is the best resource, if utilized well.
23. “A person must never allow their knowledge to deceive him, for what they do not know exceeds what they actually know.” is a scholarly statement. “As our island of knowledge grows, so does the shore of our ignorance.” is something I heard and liked.
24. Being shy is not the same as being weak. Some shy people will not do something even though they can do it. But someone without an ounce of shame will try things they are not capable to do. Do not confuse the two.
25. Justice, Patience, Interactions with other people, Generosity, and Bravery. These five are considered to be the foundation of good character.
26. Wisdom is putting things in their place (or where they will fit). For example, it means letting the stronger person do a job that requires strength and assigning a smart individual to do a job that requires knowledge and tact.
27. Know your worth. I was just chatting with a friend who said they now know the value of each day they work so that they can better enjoy time with their loved ones and spend time more consciously.
28. “I want you to believe in the values and rewards of hard work. But realize that not all success is due to hard work, and not all poverty is due to laziness. Keep this in mind when judging people, including yourself.” I found this quote from Morgan Housel to be very beautiful.
29. Do the workout you love. Whether it is hitting the gym or doing a sport or simply walking, doing what we enjoy will help us stay more consistent.
30. Enjoy life responsibly. We need to live fully and enjoy every moment and take it as it comes. However, we need to do so responsibly and safely. For example, some might consider drugs and alcohol as means of enjoyment, but it is not IMHO. A simple meal that turns out okay IS enjoyment, even though some might consider it not.

If you find some of them trite, know they have stood the test of time!

Also, I do not celebrate birthdays, but I do keep track of time! If anything, every birthday brings us closer to our graves, and it is about time I prepare for it.